SPRINGER: THE OPERA?

Yes, it's true. Hey, I love to write fiction, but I'm not this good. Coming to Broadway in the Fall of 2005.

The production, which won the Olivier Award (the British equivalent of the Tony Award) for best musical, features tap-dancing Ku Klux Klansmen, rude language and a never-ending parade of lowlifes and freaks. In the musical, Springer is shot at the end of the first act and gets dragged down to hell.

The real-life Springer saw the show last November in London and praised the production while distancing himself from the Jerry portrayed in it. "It's a persona, and they did it remarkably well," he said. "As an opera, it's perfect."